Heading Inside the Rock

As I mentioned in a previous post, 8 months ago I signed up to run the Canyon De Chelly ultramarathon. Tennessee was 3 1/2 months old at the time, and (in my sleep-deprived haze) I felt confident that, over the course of 8 months, I would be able to find the time and energy to train for a 55K (34 mile) trail run through this sacred Navajo canyon:

Flash forward 8 months. I can honestly say that I did not over-train for the run. Almost every single mile of training included Tennessee. My running was all on the road (pushing the stroller) and my trail training consisted of hiking with Tennessee in the front-pack. If I'm totally honest, my longest non-stop run was about 14.5 miles. Now I had the baby in the stroller, mind you, but that isn't going to make up for the 10-15 more miles that my longest run should have been (or the 22, 20, 18, 16+ mile runs that I should have done either). My longest hike was around 10 miles... also quite short of the training goals. There were weeks that I ran 5 days. There were weeks when I ran 0. My training plan was pretty much "go out and run whenever you feel like it for as long as you can." Apparently my new motto in life is to "just wing it" especially when there are things that I most certainly should not consider winging.
As this weekend has drawn closer, you can probably guess that I have had moments of doubt. I've wondered what I was doing, if I could finish, if the trip to Arizona would be a huge waste of time... if it all was going to be a gigantic embarrassment. I considered dropping out, but I knew it was going to be an awesome experience. This is the 3rd annual Canyon De Chelly Ultramarathon. They were only allowing about 175 runners this year (There were 100 the first year and about 150 the second.), and this is the one opportunity each year where people are allowed into the canyon without a Navajo guide and a permit. The canyon is considered sacred. They start the day with a prayer to welcome the sun given, followed by a blessing on the runners. After the run there is a traditional feast of stew and fry bread for everyone to share. Finishers of this race do not receive a medal. They get a turquoise necklace that is hand-beaded by the race directors mother-in-law. The aid stations are run by the junior high and high school cross country teams. The over-all and age-group prizes are all unique hand made items like blankets, bracelets, figurines and baskets. I knew this was a once in a lifetime kind of experience and I really didn't want to miss it.
To top it all off, my sweet Eva had decided to do a fundraiser for the Navajo youth instead of a birthday party and she was looking forward to delivering the $450+ that she had raised to the kids when we went down. So, despite my lack of proper training, despite my fear of embarrassing myself, despite the time and money involved for travel and the hotel, I decided I was going to give it my best shot. 
The last few weeks, the details have been kind of back-and-forth (and far outside my comfort zone).  Originally I had planned on camping with Jared and the girls. As the run drew nearer, Jared realized that he really could not manage to take the time off of work. Luckily my sweet dad was planning on going down. He took matters into his own hands and couple weeks before the race, he cleared his schedule to drive down with me and booked us a hotel.
So now, here we are. Everything is packed and ready to go first thing in the morning. I've found comfort in the idea that I can drop out at one of the aid stations if necessary and still have an amazing experience. My dad is confident that he will be fine with Tennessee and the girls for the 8-10 hours it will take me to run the course... even if he's never changed a dirty diaper in his life. If he's up to that kind of challenge, I guess I'm up to mine.