Happy Halloween!

It was Tennessee's very first Halloween, and the girls first Halloween at their new school. I was not quite ready to take our newborn little guy into the germy school environment to watch the parade or help with class parties.  Luckily, Jared was able to take the day off and play Mr. Mom at the school while I stayed home and cuddled our little guy.
This year, Naiya decided that she wanted to be a cowgirl. My favorite part was her freckles.  She was very specific as to how many she wanted on each cheek and how big they should be. It turned out darling.

Eva decided that she didn't get quite enough of Hermione last year and she would repeat her costume this year. As they say, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." She really is a perfect Hermione.

Tennessee didn't get to have a say in his costume. As luck would have it, he was almost exactly the same size as Eva on her first Halloween. That year, Neema had sewn an amazing little bumble bee costume for her, and, of course, we've kept it all these years. Little Tennessee totally pulled it off.

When the girls got home from school they got re-ready and we joined the crock-pot-luck party in the neighborhood. This is an extra fun tradition that our neighbor started last year. It is a fun way to get together before all the kids go out trick-or-treating. I hope the tradition continues as long as we are living here.

After the pot-luck, Jared took the girls trick-or-treating while Tennessee and I answered the door and handed out candy. It was a perfect ending to a fun day!

On a side note... I've been singing, "I'm bringing home my baby bumble bee," all day long.... do you think he's getting tired of it? ;)

A Great Bend in Our Family River

Many people have asked about the name we chose for our little man, so here is the story behind it:
When we first found out that we were having a boy, our original inclination was to honor our two fathers in some way. My dad, Jiri, goes by George, and Jared's dad, Frank, goes by Wayne. We loved the classic cowboy sound of the name George Wayne. The only problem was that, even before they were married, George (my brother) and his wife, Sarah, had talked about using the name George if they were ever to have a son. I did talk to them to see what they thought, and they were kind to encourage us to use it if we liked and to have his future cousin share the name whenever he came along. While I would not mind having the little cousins share a classic family name, it just felt like I would be taking something away from them if we were to use the name. We briefly considered the name Wayne George, but it just didn't have the same ring to it. We threw around a few other options of combinations of first/middle names, but nothing really seemed right. 
I decided to give primary naming rights of our son to Jared. I had picked the name for Naiya and we both kind of fell into Eva's name after we met her.  I figured it was only fair to let Jared name his son, but he was having the HARDEST time coming up with a good boys name. Many, many, MANY suggestions were given from all over the place, but nothing seemed to fit. Jared would find a name that he liked and ponder it for a day or two only to decide it wasn't "the name" for our son. I would certainly have to agree that some of his suggestions (Cotton?  Beetle?) were definitely NOT "the one." One name that Jared liked for a couple weeks was Wylder. I liked it okay as a middle name, but wasn't totally sold on it for a first name. Eventually the name dwindled as did the others and our baby boy continued to be nameless.
One of my closest and dearest friends, Courtney would send occasional name suggestions via text message randomly through the last couple of months before the baby was due. One evening Courtney was playing with some names using Wylder as the middle name, and she came up with Tennessee Wylder. Jared and I both loved the sound of it, and Jared decided that it was at the top of the list the list. He continued to consider other names and eventually seemed to more or less forget Tennessee as a front runner.
I, however, did not forget. I loved the sound of the name Tennessee. I would whisper it to my belly during quiet sleepless nights as I wandered around the neighborhood on a midnight stroll. The Wylder part didn't quite stick with me and I felt that naming a boy Tennessee Wylder might just be asking for trouble. I looked up the meaning of the word Tennessee and found that although it is known to be from the Cherokee language, the exact definition is unknown. It was suggested somewhere that the meaning was "river of great bend."  I loved that.  I felt like this little baby was going to be bringing a happy bend in our family. I also read that the playwright Tennessee Williams real first name was Thomas... which happens to be Jared's real first name. This coincidence just made the name even more perfect to me. I fell totally in love with the name, but I had given Jared naming rights and I wanted him to feel like he had named our son, so I kept quiet about it and let him continue to throw around names.
Naiya was pretty flexible about what she liked. She definitely didn't like the "weird" names, but was easy going and liked just about anything that wasn't too out there.  Eva was also quite flexible, but she had a soft spot for the name that she had first mentioned, James. James happens to be the name of Harry Potter's father in the series that she is all but obsessed with (she is on her 4th reading of the entire series). I thought it was kind of cool that James happens to be Jared's birth middle name. Jared, however, didn't love the name James. He felt that it was to ordinary. I suggested it as a middle name (especially if the first name was unusual), but nothing was settled. It stayed on the list in the back of my mind, but I never did put it together with Tennessee.
When it was time to go to the hospital to meet our son, we still didn't have a name. Jared would, half-jokingly, offer crazy names to the nurses who asked if we had a name. The nurses often had suggestions that they shared. (One nurse thought we should name him Noah after the flood of water that the baby was swimming in.) Nothing fit, and as our little guy arrived, he remained nameless. 
Jared would hold him and go through a list of names that he had been considering, but nothing seemed to fit. That first night as I sat in bed holding our perfect little boy I whispered Tennessee into his ear.  By the next morning, Jared still didn't have a name and I couldn't hold it in any longer.  I told him that I was totally in love with the name Tennessee and that I thought it fit him perfectly (but not with Wylder as the middle name).
Jared thought about it and a couple hours later suggested the name Tennessee James. He figured that he could call his son TJ the same way that his dad had called him TJ (Thomas Jared) growing up. It was a way for him to name his son after himself without really naming his son after himself. It was settled. Our baby boy became Tennessee James. He is going to have a big name to live up to, but something tells me that he won't have a problem with that.  He has already brought the perfect bend to our family river as our love flows around him and one another. Every single one of us could not be more in love.

Finally Getting to Welcome Tennessee

WARNING:  This is an extra long post that is mostly intended for me to reflect on and remember after time has clouded my memory. I don't expect any of you to read it (although you are welcome to, if that's your thing).

Our little Tennessee was due on October 11th. I was certain that he would come that day because 8 1/2 months before October 11th, I had signed up to run my first ultra marathon through the Navajo Lands of Canyon De Chelly... on October 11th. I had just finally come to terms with the fact that I was never going to get to hold a third little baby in my arms and had decided to schedule the race as something to fill the hole that was left. Shortly after signing up for the race, I was reminded, yet again, that I will never have total control of the timing of life (and I couldn't be more thrilled). Because of the coincidence, of the race and the due date being on the same day, I felt certain that October 11th was to be the day of his arrival.
The pregnancy had progressed perfectly with nothing unusual until about 3 weeks before my due date. The doctor noticed that my belly was measuring large. She figured we'd watch it carefully and we did as the next week my belly measured... extra large. She decided to order a growth scan to "make sure we aren't dealing with a 10 pounder."
A few days later I went into the fetal medicine department for my scan.  The ultrasound technician did several measurements and said that the baby looked to be about 6 1/2 pounds... but she did raise an eyebrow at the amount of fluid surrounding the baby. She called in the fetal medicine doctor who repeated the measurements and told me that I had close to 3 times as much fluid as the normal average measurement at this point in a pregnancy. This could mean several things. Apparently excess fluid can be a sign of gestational diabetes, a problem with the baby's digestive tract, it can be associated with birth defects, or it can just be bunch of fluid for no reason.
We had done all of the prenatal testing. In one test, they were able to extract the baby's DNA from my blood and could verify with 99.9% accuracy that the baby did not have any of the common birth defects. So that was off the table. The ultrasound showed that the kidneys and bladder were functioning, so we could check that concern off of the list. I had to repeat the gestational diabetes test to verify that I had not developed some sort of late term version of the disease, but the tests came back negative. It seemed that baby boy just had an extra large hot tub to swim in for no apparent reason.
Unfortunately, having massive amounts of excess fluids can be a concern in itself. The extra fluids prevent the babies head from being pushed down into the cervix helping it to open in preparation for child birth. Despite weeks and weeks of strong contractions, and the fact that I had easily dilated and effaced with both of my previous pregnancies, I was just not progressing this time around. The doctor was concerned that without the baby's head in place, if my water were to break, the umbilical cord could prolapse which would lead to an emergency C-section. Apparently extra fluid causes concern for possible fetal distress, an increased chance of meconium poisoning and, in some cases, stillbirth. All of this mean that I got to see my little guy on scans and listen to his heart beat for 20-30 minutes 2 to 3 times a week until the end of my pregnancy as they did fluid checks and stress tests. 
The doctor said that while these concerns were enough to make her want to suggest an induction before my actual due date or soon after, the fact that my cervix was unfavorable made her hesitate.  Starting an induction with an unfavorable cervix increases the risk of the induction being unsuccessful and again ending in a C-section. I had hoped not to be induced at all and was still banking on baby boy coming on his own on October 11th. Just to give him that extra nudge, I continued walking 4 miles a day in hopes of moving things along.
I had an appointment a few days before my due date, and it was then that I realized it probably was not going to happen. The contractions had continue to increase in intensity and frequency, but I still had not progressed at all. October 11th came and went. By October 13, my doctor decided that, even though I had still not progressed, the risks of waiting were beginning to outweigh the benefits of keeping our little guy in my belly. She would give me until the night of the 19th until she would have them do an overnight induction. (In an overnight induction, the mother is given a medication in an attempt to ripen her cervix overnight before the Pitocin is added to increase the contractions and jump start labor.)  Breaking my water and seeing what happens without medication was just not an option because of my unfavorable cervix.
When she left the room, I cried. I pulled myself together, went out to my car and cried some more. This just wasn't how I had wanted it all to go.  I wanted this to be the one pregnancy that ended on the babies terms. I didn't want to force him out before he was ready. I definitely did not want to have to get Pitocin or any other drugs to get things going. Then I remembered that I really don't have control over when/how these things were going to happen and that I was supposed to go with the flow rather than against it.
Luckily the girls had that Thursday and Friday off of school and we were all able to have a fantastic final weekend as a family of 4. Sunday night, the girls went off to have a sleepover with Neema and Jared and I headed in to the hospital.  It was finally time to meet our little guy.
We got checked in around 7 pm and the nurses got me all set up with the induction. The one funny little thing I want to always remember about my labor with Tennessee is that through that night, between drinking a ton of water and having, consistent contractions, I was getting up to use the bathroom about every 45 minutes. About half way through the night, I suddenly started singing to him every time I got up to go I would sing "Imagine me and you, and you and me. No matter how I tossed the dice it's meant to be.  The only one for me is you..."  I only know a couple lines of that song, but I only sang it when I got up to use the restroom. Never when I was in bed or sitting.  Such a funny random thing. (Now that he is here.  I still find myself randomly singing that song to him as we snuggle during quiet moments in our day.)
The labor was long and included a few kinda scary moments including a couple possible preps for a C-section and some fetal distress. Luckily our happy, healthy, sweet little boy came into this world at 3:47 pm on Monday, October 20th SCREAMING his cute little head off. He was SOOOO mad to have been evicted from his nice warm home, but we all fell in love at first sight. When I first looked at him as they placed his screaming little self on my chest I was so overwhelmed with emotion. I could not believe that after waiting so long for this little person to arrive he was finally there. He was perfect in every way and I just could not wait for the girls to get to meet him.
I will never forget their darling faces as they walked into the room to meet their little brother. Naiya's eyes welled up with tears as she held him for the first time. Eva was grinning from ear to ear. It was awesome to get to watch them fall as instantly in love as Jared and I had each time we had met our babies for the first time. They ooohed and awed over his yawns and sneezes. They rushed to his side at the slightest sign of a cry. We all spent countless minutes just staring at him. (Truth be told, we still do.)
The first night at the hospital when it was time for Jared to take the girls home, Naiya was so upset. She offered to sleep on the floor and wake up at 5 in the morning so that she would make it to school. In the end, she had to go home, but I'm not sure how much sleep she actually got.
The next day Jared took the girls out of school a couple hours early and brought them back to the hospital. Eva just sat staring at him and said to me "Now I understand why you always tell us not to grow. I want him to stay like this forever."
It has been so fun to watch the girls get to know their little brother. They have been the best big sisters. In fact they have both told me at different times not to tell the other but they "want to be Tennessee's favorite sister."  Something tells me they both will get to carry that honor from now until forever. He couldn't ask for more loving sisters to tend to his every need, and we couldn't have asked for a more perfect way to complete our little family.

Things I Forgot (But Have Remembered in the Last 5 Days)

I forgot how tired and sore I'd be.
I forgot how everything leaks... Everything... from everywhere... onto everything.
I forgot that before I can even think about getting my figure back, I'll have to borrow Dolly Parton's for a while.
I forgot about the laundry... masses and masses of it from one tiny person....
I forgot how nothing gets done.
I forgot how impossible it is to have anything scheduled... even with help.
I forgot that even though I'll make time for a quick shower, I will not have the time, energy or desire to actually "get ready" for a day.

I forgot that none of that matters.
I forgot the feeling of your tiny fingers wrapped around mine.
I forgot how even when I can sleep, I won't want to because I'd rather watch you sleep.
I forgot how little it matters if there are dishes in the sink and laundry to be done when I can be holding you instead.
I forgot how every little noise, movement, and face you make would create an ache in my heart to hold on to these moments forever.
I forgot how much I would instantly, fiercely, and irreversibly love you.

A Long Awaited Announcement

Those who are closest to me know just how long awaited this announcement is. 

With love over-flowing from my heart, may I present to you:

Tennesee James Chamberlain

October 20, 2014

7 pounds 14.5 ounces

21 inches long

Helping the Homeless

I have been blessed with two little girls that have hearts full of love. I loved that Naiya wanted to do a fundraiser for the Humane Society of Utah instead of a birthday party. It was a lot of work for all of us, but it was absolutely something I wanted to support.
I did not encourage or expect Eva to choose to do something similar... but she did. Eva has always been worried about the homeless population. She frequently talks about growing up to design and build inexpensive eco-friendly houses for people. She hopes to be able to sell them for around $100. :) 
When the time came to plan what we would do for her birthday celebration this year,  she announced that she wanted to do something for the homeless shelter. She thought about doing some sort of bake sale to raise money, but what she truly wanted to do was to organize a dinner for everyone at the homeless shelter.  That would involve buying and preparing food for 150-300 people (depending on the location). Since I was a few weeks from my due date, this felt a little too overwhelming of an undertaking. Luckily, I was able to talk her into helping on a bit of a smaller scale.  We decided to contact the Road Home Shelter in Salt Lake and ask what kinds of things they needed and then do a donation drive to collect items.  We did not hand out flyers through the neighborhood this time, but did do a Facebook post and created flyers to give to Eva's classmates and soccer teammates. In the end, thanks to the many generous people in our lives, we had the back of the Kia filled to the brim with blankets, toiletries, and clothing. 
The week after Eva's birthday, we found time to deliver all of the donations to the shelter. The volunteer coordinator invited us to do a tour of the facilities. It was a very humbling experience for all of us.  The girls were pretty quiet as they took it all in and listened to what the tour guide was telling us. Although we did not meet specific families (to protect their privacy), we did hear a few stories. One thing that stood out for me was that there were 3 newborn babies (4 weeks and younger) currently at the facility with 2 more expected in the next month.  It was heartbreaking to think about someone having to bring a brand new baby "home" to a homeless shelter. 
On our way home, the girls talked about how lucky they felt to have all that we have.  They started planning other ways to help and trying to decide what next year's birthday service projects would be.  The whole day was a touching experience. 
Happy 8th birthday to our amazing Eva!

I am incredibly proud of my two sweet girls. I know that they will be amazing influences on their soon to be born baby brother. I can't wait!

Martin is Married

This weekend marked that last of the Grygar kids getting hitched. Martin finally was able to marry his sweetheart Travis in a spectacular celebration in Austin, Texas. Unfortunately I was unable to travel as I am too far into this pregnancy to fly and the drive out there would be way to long for me. Luckily the girls and Jared were still able to be a part of their special day. The girls got to be flower girls in the ceremony and had wore these dazzling dresses. 

The rainy weather didn't hamper the celebration at all and they didn't miss a beat as they successfully moved the festivities inside at the last minute. From what I hear the execution was flawless and the guest couldn't have guessed that the way it went was not quite what was planned all along. (I would expect nothing less than a perfect "plan b" from the two of them).

Although I wasn't there to celebrate, everyone was sure not to let me feel left out. Between the text updates from Jared, my mom and the girls and the actual phone call from Martin and Travis just after the ceremony, I feel like I got to share the experience. I had to tell everyone to stop worrying about me and to go enjoy the party! :)

I missed everyone and was sad to not be there in person, but I am so, so happy to welcome Travis to our family.